There are as many theories on raising toddlers as there are parents, but in our house we have four inviolate house rules: No hitting, no kicking, don't exceed the "polite society volume level," and don't walk on the couch! Ignoring any one of these results in "Time Out," when we send the Mimi to her room until she stops screaming.
I called Mom today. And as we were having a lovely conversation, the Mimi began her regularly-scheduled conquest of the couch. "SIT!" I yelled at Shirley, invoking the Voice. She promptly sat, then gave me her best "I was merely investigating the compressability of the couch cushion-I can't believe you would question my baby honor by implying that anything untoward was occurring" innocent look, followed by blowing kisses. (Her new way of appologizing for minor infractions.)
Then, of course, I had to explain to Mom what was going on. "I love her, but sometimes I don't understand her in the slightest."
She chuckled. "Sounds like another little girl I know. Just wait until the teenage years!"
It's too bad that when we visited Grandma she was feeling too poorly to tell stories from when Mom was a toddler!